Rae's Playlist No. 1

My song right now-
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=4LMgO4JyBp4

ABSOLUTELY, absolutely love this. Also think it should be made into a Titanic tribute vid. (http://obsessedwithtitanic.blogspot.com/)

The Weighty Question

I'm pretty sure it's been around forever.

"I need to gain weight!" "I need to lose it!" "I'm ugly because my body is just a smidge off my desired BMI!!!!"

Okay, okay! I'm one of them.

There was a time, not that long ago, when skinny was not attractive. Do any of my theatre geek friends just notice that moment, in Funny Girl, when Mr. Keeney is trying to get Fanny(Barbra)'s attention, and calls her "the girl with the skinny legs"? Look at Marylin Monroe. Look at Judy Garland. Look at anyone from the 20's-60's They had a perfect, beautiful body shape. Know why? Because that's the way they were.

I have a lot of girlfriends who are super-slim. I'm not saying that's bad. What would be bad is if they went through surgeries and specialized diets and what-not that could make them look like someone who was simply bigger.  I have bigger bones than some of my friends. Some girls are slim, some are curvy. You know why? Because they're built that way.

Hey, guess what? I have a confession. My chest and hips don't align perfectly. But that's not going to change, because my hip width is inherited, and I'm proud of it, and if you want to call me fat, then, go ahead. I know I'm not.

Hey, chicas! I really don't think it's worth it to go through bulimia, anorexia, and diets that make you sick to look like a stick. If that's news to you, you need to take a serious look at yourself and ask what's going on. You need help. And we need to embrace ourselves. There's nothing wrong with getting in shape, pounding little bits of fat we don't want away. But if you're trying to be a different you entirely, then who are you in the first place?

~Rae <3

On Titanic....again

The question I may use to decide how well you know me is, "Who's my favorite actor?" If you don't know, you can't have known me very well. I am a crazy theatre geek, and my friends can attest to that fact. But, sorry, my favorite actor will forever and always be Leonardo Wilhelm DiCaprio. (By the way, did you know that an agent wanted to change his name to Lenny Williams because they thought his real name was too hard to pronounce? Yeah. SO glad they didn't.) And, of course, I love The Aviator and Inception and anything Leo, but my favorite movie will always and forever be Titanic.

Ah, deep romantic sigh.

NOW. I have guy friends, and I love them to death. But, they can't really understand my obsession with this movie. "Umm, Titanic sails, boy meets girl, boy and girl fall in love, boy dies. WUT NOW?" (this is why I then try to unsuccessfully talk them out of their point of view. So far, it hasn't worked. No surprise there.) Now, I hope I'm fair about the fact that, yes, in essence, that is what the storyline is. But they're missing the point completely! Titanic, to me, is so much more than that.

First and foremost, let me say right here and now-it's a chick flick, boys. I'm not expecting you to become a crazy fan. That would, in fact, be a little creepy. More than a little creepy. When I rag on you for treating it badly-keep in mind, I'm a mean person. It's in my nature, or something. That is our little game-you hate it, I try to convince you to not, it doesn't work, I'm okay with that. Moving on.

Second of all, I'm in love. And I know most girls say that at this age, and then end up with another guy two weeks later. But my friends know that when it comes to me-yes, I'm dramatic. But I'm also legit, absotively posolutely in love. And that's taken a huge, huge bear

ring on the way I watch Titanic. First is the Big Question-were Jack and Rose really in love? First of all, for proper chick-flick-romance-and-obsessed-with-this-movie-cause-Leo-is-yummy purposes, I am obligated for a yes. Seccond of all, that really depends on the way you describe love. Did they

have enough attatchment to die for each other? Yes. Did they have enough attatchment to put the other first? Yes. Did they prove their attatchment over time? Well, therein lies the past 14 years of people's skeptical mindset. What would have happened if they had both survived? We actually

can't tell. There are some who say, "Oh, their love was strong. They made it" and there are some who say "No way on earth! It was superficial and they fell apart." The truth, people? We really can't prove anything. Sorry. Feelings change a lot for some people, and not at all for other people. For me, I'm inclined to think they made it, simply because of the affection and relationship they showed, and also because that's the way the story should go, in my point of view. So there, nyeahhh.

SO. Now that we have that cleared up-where were we? Oh yeah, I'm in love. *lovestruck grin* And looking at it, the question runs through my mind-"Would I jump off that boat for ----?" (For blog post purposes, and the privacy he so dearly adores, we'll call him The Man....) The truth-sorry melodramatic attitudes-is that I'll probably never know. I would hope that I would love The Man enough to go down to E deck and cut off his handcuffs, or jump off the rescue ship because I couldn't leave him. But I don't really know, as I haven't been faced with the circumstances. THIS, dear ones, is what we would call a "what if" situation. The Man is not fond of these, at all. "Why ask me if I would when it hasn't happened?" Oh, the realistic meets the dramatic. What a beautiful waltz! Meanwhile, I'm cultivating the love to do that. One thing I wonder, however-no, scratch that, two things. Number one-Is jumping off that boat love, or craziness? You decide that.  The other thing that strikes me on occasion is, if Rose just stayed put in that boat, the chances would be a lot greater that she and Jack would have made it out of the wreck alive. But, of course, Jack has to die, the story wouldn't be right if he lived. (More on that later.)

I'm a history buff. I'm planning to minor in it in college, that's how big of a history buff I am. And I don't know if I'm the only one who thinks this, but the story just wouldn't be right-it wouldn't hold that charisma of a whole different time, if it was in the present. (Erm duh.) Of course, the story is actually set in the present-everything on the Titanic is a flashback. Woo! I'm infatuated with the charisma that history holds, the different culture and propriety and people. Also, older people, to me, hold an entire history book of their lives inside. World War 1, World War 2, bobby socks and poodle skirts, heels around the house, disco fever, phonebooth stuffing, Eve Arden, Walter Pigeon, Lucille Ball, Dick van Dyke, goldfish gulping, go-go girls, The Beatles, Pet Rocks, The Cold War, and the time when women were woman, children were children, and men were all good-looking. (Woot woot!) It's fascinating to me, history is. And that may be part of the reason I love Titanic so much, is because it's so historical, mixed in with the romance and tragedy.

I confess. I love Mr. Andrews. So much. All the more so since Victor Garber was also a stage actor. (Anthony in Sweeney Todd, anyone?) And I would like to explain to people-and maybe I'm not the only one who feels this way-is that, guess what? Jack dies. And it's sad. Horrible. Tear-fest, even. But it's supposed to happen. Rose has to lead a life without him. Part of the story is that she had a wonderful life, because he made her promise to never let go. He kept her going, her whole life. But for that to happen, Jack is supposed to die. But Mr. Andrews?! I mean, part of this film is historical. But that doesn't keep me from being sad when Mr. Andrews stops the clock in the lounge and waits for the ship to sink, doing nothing. Whole 'nother tear-fest right there.

I greatly bemoan the fact that I cannot cry when I watch Titanic. I know, I'm awful, right? Oh, yes, a depression overtakes me. And I WANT to cry. But I can't. *hangs head* I'm not a person who cries at movies.  Depression? Chyeah. But I can't cry. Awful.

 I hesitate to end this post, as I know I'll probably end up writing another Titanic-related post. Maybe not soon, but most likely, I'll be jotting down my reflections on this masterpiece. In the meantime-HAPPY BIRTHDAY, LEO! Next month <3 and hip, hip, huzzah, James Cameron.  You make me smile.

~rae <3

Rambles on fall.

 Today, I ponder upon how much I hate fall.

Well, okay. Maybe that's a bit harsh. But fall just isn't my thing. Everyone around me is like "Yay! Cute winter clothes! Yay! Juicy apples! Yay! Pretty leaves! Yay! Cool weather!"

1-Cute on you, not necessarily on me.
2-Not big on apples.
3-Those leaves are only pretty until the winter eats them.
4-I'm such a summer person. Hate cold.

Can I just be a major Debbie Downer here?! I mean, school starts. The days get shorter. All the leaves crumble and fall. Noses get chapped, as do lips and hands and health. Runny noses. Frozen ground. Memories of summer. For all those people who love fall, good for you. And I do admit, it holds a certain charisma, even for me. I just wish it was warmer.

Okay, after that wonderful display........even I have some things I like about fall. School starts, and, along with that, HELP starts. For those of you who don't know me, I'm a homeschooler, and hysterically proud of that fact. Higher Extension Learning Program, or HELP is where I take Lit/Comp, and more importantly to me, DRAMA. I get to see all my friends whom I've missed over the summer and audition and we all have a grand time.

I don't usually talk about it, but each season with its essence gets a major emotional response from me. Spring isn't as big, but hey, everybody loves spring. Summer gives me the fabulous, "the world is everything and I am anything" feeling. Winter is such a comforting, reminiscent, magical feeling. And fall is sad, but strong at the same time. It's a reminder of how big the world is. Feelings like this can be difficult to put into words.

So, fine. I guess fall isn't so bad.

Random weird things about me.

I'm so bored.

I'm in love with Jack Dawson. I know everyone was in 1997, but hey, I was 2 years old then. So I'm in love with him NOW. ;)

I take a nap like every day, go to bed late, and am tired for work the nest morning. Never fails.

I have a better emotional response to music when I'm in bed than when I'm outside. I guess I can concentrate on it better or something.

I procrastinate well. I know everyone does, but mine is like almost a serious case, like a I-don't-know-if-I'll-get-into-college case. Stupid habits.

I don't appreciate milk, pork, chicken, steak, cheese, peanut butter, Mexican food, strawberries, or apples like people should. I'm extremely picky.

I blow e-very-thing out of proportion. WAY out of proportion. Scarily out of proportion.

I have scars all over my legs. Sad thing? They're all from bug bites and me scratching them over and over again. Sigh.

I love biking to the library. I COULD ask my sister to drive me, but I like to have sweat pouring down my back when I walk in, like "Oh yeah, I just biked in 96-degree weather, and YOU drove. Ahahaha."

I have a very, very, VERY thin skin. It's gotten a lot better, but it took a lot to get a thick one. Thus, I can laugh things off much better now.

I always tell myself that the sun will come out eventually, if not tomorrow, and I gotta keep going. Optimist? I don't label myself in that area. That's just my mantra.

My nails are awful. My guy friends have better nails than me, and that's wrong.

I still leap into bed after turning off the light. Stupid dark.

Green olives, marinated mushrooms and gumbo are my loves.

I used to sing in the shower. But, guess what? I found the garage is better.

I love life sometimes. I mean, like REALLY crying-a-bucketload-of-tears happy and all. I love those times.

My mom asked me if I had had my first kiss a while ago. Nope, I haven't. My guess? It'll be a stage kiss.

~Rae

I made a pome.

Sweat
Heat
Pain
The hot wind
Blowing against my face
Pumping hard
Pushing
the bike pedals
My neighborhood
The same
all
over
splashes of personality
cling to
the houses
paved roads
healthy trees
The sounds of
a party
Take the off road
The no outlet road
The stony road
Nearly deserted
An old man
Frail man
He pushes his walker
and I wonder-
He has a whole life
behind
those
wheels
All the pain
tears
joy
love
anger
roughness
from hewing out
from a small baby's mind
a human being.
A wife
kids
grandkids
accomplishments
a life
too full
to be contained
behind
those
wheels
I took the off road
The no outlet road
The stony road
Nearly deserted
A girl
walks by
walking a dog
as big as she is
blond ponytail
shorts
baggy shirt
For an odd reason
my mind screams
"california girl
but
she lives in Ohio."
I smile at her
but
the smile
is for the fluffy dog.
I took the off road
The no outlet road
The stony road
Nearly deserted
A boy
about my age
mows the lawn
his shirt and shorts
coordinate
Is he looking at me?
Why?
He's dark
lanky
I bike on.
I took the off road
The no outlet road
The stony road
Nearly deserted
I come full circle
to the end
of
the
road
Houses
slightly run down
I imagine
frightening men
drinking beer
who live
behind
those
old
windows
the forest
has
an
old
blue
sign
nailed to an outlying tree
nothing on it
just a blue canvas
infinite possibilities
in a can
of
paint
I'm not the kind of girl
who would trek
into
that
forest
rule-breaker
fearless
I'm just
me
Do I regret it?
No.
I turn back
onto
The nicely paved roads
and the houses
all the same
lucky
rich
but
not the kind of
old
sad
personality
I found
In my no outlet road.

Not my road, but sure purdy.

So.........I write songs.

Gah. 

I'm the type of girl who shares her inner being with just about everyone. Which is probably why I'm doing this.

Okay, people, you know what? I write songs. 

I just do.

Dad and I were driving home from work one day (mine, not his >:) ) and he says, "Do you hear me talking. That would make a good song." Being Daddy Dear he goes off and all rockstar on me. I sat in relative silence for a few minutes and then turned to him and sang, "Do you hear me talking, baby? What is this road we're walking, baby? When I say yes and you say no and I say stop and you say go-how will it be today?" (I don't even think those are the words. That's how random my bursts are.)

Ha. He wasn't expecting that.

"Did you write that?!"

"Uh-huh."

Too bad I didn't finish it. I kinda liked it, myself. I'm not so happy with writing music, ironically. Music can flow from my mouth if I'm trying it out on a verse. But I like spinning and squeezing lyrics into something people just might, in some unexplored universe, enjoy. Maybe you even do. I don't know. *jumps around*

{My personality's not your bad habit/I redraw the line wherever you erase it}

{Your face says I'll never win you over/But who's gonna hate me for one four-leaf clover?}

{Give me your summer romance/The one that didn't work out/I'll show you a cliche/And a boy not worth a shout}

"Let your tears come. Let them water your soul." Eileen Mayhew

When I was a kid, life was good. When all you have to worry about is what game you're going to play today, life is good.

Lately, I've seen that there's a dark cloud hanging over my head. Maybe it's made of every stupid thing I ever did. Maybe it's made of all the good things I didn't know. Goodness knows I'm no genius, maybe I don't WANT to know.

Talking to one of my very best friends tonight, he told me I was sad all the time, and, needless to say, he made it clear to me that it wasn't good. 

"Well, okay. I'll try to be happy."

"Good!"

When I got off the phone, I stopped to think about it. I'm not a "happy" person. I have a need for intensity in everything I do. I can thrive on sorrow, a lot of  laughter, passion, and physical pain. I didn't know if I wanted to be "happy".

Well, now. Let me rephrase. GOODNESS KNOWS I don't want to be a depressed emo freak all my life. But most of my friends have a very uncomplicated life. I've gone through things they haven't, and as a result of genes, hard experiences, and just being me, I have an annoyingly complex personality. It's in my nature to be dramatic, and I almost ENJOY being sad sometimes. I don't want to change for anyone, but I don't want to be sad all the time. I want a happy balance. And sometimes, all my happy friends can't understand that. It's odd, almost funny. 

My life would make a good comic strip.

This blog post is almost a letter. Sometimes, everyone should just let me fix my own problems. Sometimes, I want to be happy. Sometimes, I want to be sad. Sometimes, I want to be me.

To HELP.......I'm a freaking introvert.

 Just.....let me mope, okay?

My family are a bunch of introverts. Like, Star Trek watching, Internet junkie introverts. And even I need alone time sometimes.

Now, when I was littler, that wasn't such a bad thing. My mom arranged playdates and when those weren't going on, I was okay with playing with my sisters. Life was so simple.

Then I turned 11, and I started going to HELP. Now, I love HELP deeply. It's like home. I'm not saying I don't. I love it so much I could cry, that's how important it is to me. And, when I was 11, 12, 13, it wasn't such a big deal that I didn't hang out with the other girls, that we were just "class friends". 

But then, around 13-14, I started to realize I was getting popular. Now, I do NOT want to sound conceited, but it's true. Ask anyone who the 3 most popular boys and the 4 most popular girls were in drama last semester, and they would say Aaron Marshall, Adam Roesner, and Isaac Owens, and Cassidy Conlin, Mattie Jones, Rachel Funke, and.....me. It was almost to a point of matching us up with the boys. That's what comes of being a wee bit bubbly and having an uncontrollable laugh. 

That, however, was last year.

I'm struggling, now, to keep the friends I made. I HATE talking on the phone, it just makes me nervous. It's probably my OCD coming through, which means talking on the phone is GOOD for me. I don't think of hanging out with people often enough, I never grew up with it. I have a hard time connecting. So I see my friends slipping away. You know why? You all are normal. Surprise! You don't exactly know what to do with me.

You all know who you are. I love you all and I WANT to be your friends. I'm not a manic emo who hates everybody just because I'm struggling to make life work with junior year (UGH) and I grew up the weird, introverted child. It's true, I like Peabo Bryson, jazz, being alone, and I obsess over things a lot. I don't fit in. I'm trying.

Don't drift away, just give me a kick in the teeth and call me. Let's hang out.I want to be your friend, honest.

Sorry to be pushy and weird. This is the solution I see, to fixing a problem and explaining you need to give me a bit of understanding. I'm a 5-year-old learning how to ride a bike. I'm a 16-year-old trying to break out of being introverted. I'm not used to being good friends with people. Odd, but true.

Rae's playlist-as of now.

 Um, why am I listening to dance music?!

Most people have boundaries on music. Say, they love country and hate rap. Then there are the rap-worshipers that despise pop. Some love indie and nothing else. Me, I love everything. I'll listen to country, pop, soft pop, show tunes, rap, hip-hop, electronica, dance, a little bit of indie, a little bit of rock, soundtrack, so on and so on. I love EVERYTHING. That being said, here's some of my picks as of now.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=LupeGtJ3a3E

Selena Gomez and the Scene-Love You Like a Love Song

Haters gonna hate. This song is way too catchy, even if the lyrics are kinda cheesy. Who's gonna listen to every single song on her new album when it hits iTunes?

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=-zuviud2HHQ

Cascada-Every Time We Touch

So, it's kinda old. I don't give a rip. NOTE-Most versions of this song are dance or radio edits. The first time I heard it, I heard Yanou's Candlelight Mix, which is slower, and might just make you cry. http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ajRMeQxtirY

(Yes, it's a Titanic tribute vid. Deal with it.)

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=qLMCVsa_-Wc

Bianca Ryan-I Will

Also kinda old, and most people don't know who she is. Bianca won the premiere season of America's Got Talent at 11 years old-and no wonder. I love her music and even her covers. In fact, let's have a little more Bianca....

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=mvm1HRm3tWg

Bianca Ryan-I Wish That

I dare you not to cry.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=SPUJIbXN0WY

Michael Bublé-Everything

The first Michael Bublé song I ever heard. So darling. <3

Dare I do more later, loves? Maybe, maybe.

What love is.

 When I was younger, I had a crush on a guy named Steven. Brown hair, freckles, cocky, rugged, loud. I adored him. When I found out he liked me too, an interesting feeling hit me-the feeling of having someone like you back. I tried to define love, but it was hard.

 Now, obviously, this whole post is not about Steven of the Cute Freckles. That was years ago, when I was 8 or so. I lost touch with him, and haven't talked to him in years. Oh no, this is really about love.

One of my guy friends once asked me, "What's your definition of love?" It freaked me out. I had had a pretty loose definition of love for a while. On me asking him the same question, he replied, "The amount of care for a person that compels one to accept them fully for who they are and gives them the strength of character to deal with issues and solve things instead of giving up."

Well, wow.

That'll take the freaking cake.

But I've spent the past year or so trying to grow into a mature person, and I think love can be construed a lot of different ways now. It would be far-fetched to say I LOVED Steven, even if I liked him a lot. Love takes a lot, and when you're 8, you're not ready to be in love.

Technically, part of a definition of true love, for me, is to be willing to stay with that person, and ONLY that person, all your life. I'm in love, but not love that deep. It's unfair to ask that of anyone at 16, or even a couple years older. It's not easy to reach that level of love until you're talking marriage.

Also, it appears to me that love can mature, if helped. I've heard so many times that older couples love each other now more than the day they were married. Maybe it was going through life together. I guess they may know the secret.

Love is a deep affection for one person, and it's also actions. I, admittedly, still have to work on this. The reason I've been working on being more mature is for, um, love reasons. You might have to change just a little bit for that person, and if you love them, you can do it.

That's another thing. If you love someone-and this applies to friends too-then it's almost your duty to help them, not only through hard times, but through their faults. I'm not saying when you fall in love with someone, you have to make them perfect. You don't have to make them stop biting their nails or dress better. But if they have major faults or problems, it's your job to help them with that, but not to take them over.

Ah, borne of a Sunday afternoon with naught to do. I'm not saying all these things are things you need to do. Maybe I'm wrong. Maybe your definition is better. But I think these are ways love can be construed. Pardon my musings.

~Rae <3

Adventures of an Irresponsible Sophomore.

 I must admit it. These past couple years haven't been the best for my schooling.


I guess it started around March 2008 or so. Sarah was going to fly to Florida to visit the grandparents, and for some reason, my school started slipping. Bad stuff, but no big deal, eh?


VERY big deal.


It kept slipping and slipping and slipping until I really wasn't sure how far behind I was anymore. I was behind for literally MONTHS. Dad punished me severely, but really, I wasn't about to do anything until I could get up the mindset to do it. Eventually, I did. The end, right?


Wrong.


Ever since then, it's been a habit of mine to let my school get behind. I'm bright, don't get me wrong. I'm rather good in Algebra and music. But I just don't feel like doing it yet. Bad idea. I rejoice when I keep it up, and you know what? It feels really, really good. But for some reason, I can never keep it up. Unfortunately, NOW it's starting to really matter, because I'm in high school and these grades will affect my life. Groan.


Pick up the pencil, open the book. And fall asleep with boredom.


Hopefully it'll get better.

2010, in 12 Nutshells.

I credit the brainchild of this post to Emily Clifton(http://emilyclifton.tumblr.com/), for her end-of-year blog post about 2010. I was like, "Well, why shouldn't I do that?" except I'll take things a bit differently. I'm going to list the alphabet, and words that they stand for that have something to do with my year. Fun eh?! Tally-ho!


A-My new-found guy friends, Adam and Aaron. They're the best.
B-Baptism. My little sister joined the church this year.
C-Callie, LeAnna, and Katie...friends <3
D-Doctors, who took care of our massive and horribly-timed outbreak of strep throat.
E-Sweet Ethan Landreman, who lived for minutes and will be remembered forever.
F-Fiddler on the Roof, which I miss!!!
G-Grandpa Brown, who finally gets to be with his wife, whom he loved deeply.
H-HELP, my homeschool co-op which I so adore.
I-iPod, which I used so much during the year it's surprising it isn't broken.
J-Job, which Dad and I seriously talked about me getting :D
K-Kitten, Abby's new baby that we got in July or so.
L-Lady GaGa, whom I decided I loved. Her music is way too catchy.
M-Mornings. They're so much more satisfactory in the summertime.
N-Never Say Never...I have Bieber Fever <3
O-Oklahoma, which I watched for the first time this year!
P-Pierced-my little sister had her ears pierced :D
Q-Quiet, which we never got at Cedar Creek this year, due to the rain on the roof.
R-Room. I'm moving downstairs soon babayy!
S-Surgery, which some of the people I'm closest to had this year. Not fun.
T-Titanic, my new-found favorite movie.
U-Underdog, best superhero theme song ever.
V-Vaida and Titus-twin's friends came to OH for a while :)
W-Weekend meeting in TN-first year going, had so much fun!
X-Xactly why does everyone think Ke$ha's so hot?!
Y-Year, Sarah's senior year.....
Z-Zoom-wait, where'd the year go?!

 Me in January 2010...

And January 2011.

The Epic Music Series-Love Songs (Pop)

Mercy sakes alive, I've been away too long. Not that there's more than like 3 people who read this blog, but oh well. Here goes, pop love themes. Tally-ho, off we go.


1- We'll Be Together (Ashley Tisdale)-http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=1lrVU5Or2do

I used to listen to this all the time. It still makes me want to sing it to an audience of many.


Music or lyrics-Music.


iTunes avaliability-Available.


2-I Still Believe (Hayden Panettiere)-http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=XmMiANOTSZM

Even my older sister likes this one. It's atypical, waltz-y, absolutely irresistible.


Music or Lyrics-Lyrics.


iTunes availability-Unfortunately, this is a bonus track for Princess Disneymania, so unless you buy the whole album, you can't get it. I was not happy.


3-Ever Ever After (Carrie Underwood)-http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=MD1cadVwJqE

Um, duh. This is also atypical, happy, and still retains pop strains. And hey, it's Carrie. You gotta love it.


Music or Lyrics-Music...maybe...


iTunes availability-Unfortunately, just like I Still Believe, this is a bonus track for the Enchanted album. However, I found a version by Jordan Pruitt that's pretty good as well.


4-She Will Be Loved (Maroon 5)-http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=pUVxaYdgS_Q

I just discovered this like yesterday, and I absolutely love it.


Music or Lyrics-Music.


iTunes availability-I THINK so.


5-Never Had A Dream Come True-http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=6cSz2PEck1I

I found this on a Titanic tribute, and again, it was an amazing find.


Music or Lyrics-Lyrics.


iTunes availability-I believe so.


This may be edited later, we'll see.......tally-ho, folks!

Green Stuff.

 I actually like vegetables. LOVE them, more like it.


I was born in Hidden Valley. Well, practically. And you know those Chef Boyardee ads, "Behold the mythical vegetable-loving kid"?


He exists, baby. That's me.


When I was younger, my parents had to make me eat a cookie before I had more broccoli. I've just always liked vegetables. I seriously enjoy grossing people out by eating every vegetable they hate in front of them. Squash? Beautiful. Asparagus, broccoli, cucumbers? Delish. Brussel sprouts? Favorite.


Cucumbers are a special thing about this house, because Mom hates me going and eating the gourmet cucumbers. (Yes, I can put away half a cucumber by myself. Got a problem with that?) But it is bliss to cut up a cucumber and pour on the dressing and act all vegetarian. MMM. 


I love it.


I am supposed to cut carrots into little pieces when I eat them, because of my braces. No way, yo. If my brackets wanna break, so be it. And so far, it's been pretty much fine. SO THERE.


I'm totally stark raving mad, I know.

'Tis the Season

I hate cold. I just hate it.


It's days like this, when I wake up, stumble out of bed to the window-and OH SNAP WHERE'D THE DRIVEWAY GO TO!?-when I remember summer with a fond gleam in my eye. Summer, where you wear short sleeves (my favorite) and no shoes...summer, where it's warmer outside than it is inside...Summer, where I go outside on the tree swing, plug in my iPod and lose myself in music and daydreams...summer, that feels made of dreams. I've always been able to put up with heat a lot more than my family.


But UGH. You go outside, and you freeze your ears off. Wind slashes through you, trying to make you quit breathing. Slippery slush, icky ice, days of no shoes are swept away by the wind. I think I'll pull a lazy and stay inside watching Titanic, Letters to Juliet, and Cats all day. 


Admittedly, now I sound like a grump. Unfortunately, that's who I am sometimes. Oh yeah, Rachel's a grump. Either that, or she's spazzing out and cracking rude jokes. Yep, that's my girl. Sigh.


There are some things I like about the season, this crazy winter. I went to the store a few days ago to buy presents for our version of Christmas (don't judge, my dad will explain every bit of it to you-he's the one who has us say "no" to Santa Claus.). We get presents and goof around and have a very good time, thank you very much. 


So. Anyway. Shopping. I hadn't had a lot of money in a while, since I hadn't done my job to receive the moolah. I had CASH, baby. Ooh, buy presents. You mean for me? Good on ya, mate. Tally-ho! And it's off to the junior department I sail. Cute clothes, big sales, and while I'm standing there, I hear a woman crooning over the loudspeaker "Let it snow, let it snow, let it snow...". Something about that song is just so cozy. *Grin*


Off to buy twin presents. While shopping, I hear again "Baby, it's cold outside..." I love seasonal music. I also hear the to-be-expected Sugar Plum Fairy theme twinkling down through the speakers. I adore a good instrumental.


I get the backseat all to myself and I see a snowflake land on the window. I am sitting right next to one of those giant lights they have in store parking lots, and I center myself so I can see the snowflake right in front of the light. It's an intricate pattern. It's hard to believe something that perfect could just fall from the sky. I smile. God is good.


So, okay. Maybe I hate cold. Maybe I wish for summer. But winter has its good points too. 


I refuse to wear winter clothes, though. Deal with THAT.

This was back in August...*sigh*

The Epic Music Series-Love Songs (General)

I am purely addicted to love songs. Like, seriously. I find them all over and add them to my iPod like crazy. Pop, country, soft pop, rock, show tunes, instrumentals, etc. I can never get enough. So here are some love songs you may have never listened to, or given a second thought to. (Excuse my grammar.) Tally-ho, off we go.


1-Far Longer Than Forever (The Swan Princess)-http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=bQTFm2WmAus

Not a Disney movie, not as famous as Tangled, but this song is still beautiful, for those who judge. I love the lyrics. This song has nearly brought me to tears.


Music or Lyrics-Lyrics, but the music comes close.


iTunes availability-Avaliable, fo sho!


2-Because You Loved Me (Up Close and Personal)-http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=9CkKuA86Mis

This is another one of those songs that I have a not-so-secret wish to sing onstage someday. I love Celine Dion, I love the music, I love the lyrics, I love the whole thing. (And pleased that I can reach every note she hits in this arrangement. ( :D )


Music or Lyrics-Lyrics, but with the music, they make an absolutely magical combo.


iTunes availability-Available :)


3-My Heart Will Go On (Titanic)-http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=yZehdyawD9A&feature=related

You knew it was coming :) Titanic is my favorite movie, and this song is absolutely enchanting. I also want to sing this onstage for an audience someday. 


Music or Lyrics-Music. But I am quite partial to the second chorus more than the first.


iTunes availability-Available. NOTE-There are several different versions of this song on iTunes. The soundtrack version is longer and has a beautiful instrumental near the ending, but isn't as powerful as the version Celine Dion recorded for a different album. On top of it all, there's a new dialogue mix from the album Back to Titanic, which incorporates lines from the movie during the instrumental breaks. Make a careful choice, or if you're a big Titanic fan, buy all , like I did :)


4-Somewhere Out There (An American Tail)-http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=RkI-B2JWSZI&feature=related

This song is so sweet. With its poetic lyrics and soft pop piano, it's enough to make anyone wonder why people don't write this kind of song anymore.


Music or Lyrics-Um. Both. Please don't make me have to pick.


iTunes availability-Available. I have the version by Knightsbridge.


5-You Raise Me Up (Contemporary Christian?)-http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=xhYz4_-wp0I

My friend Sarah and I performed this at a talent show and had the judges on their feet :) It's such a beautiful song.


Music or Lyrics-Both. Don't make me pick.


iTunes availability-Available. I have the version by Celtic Woman, which is the link I posted.


6-The Rose (The Rose)-http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ogU40xk5Prk

This is an unusual song that doesn't reach very far on the scale, with poetic lyrics and a simple tune. 


Music or Lyrics-Lyrics.


iTunes avaliability-Available. The link I posted is by Bianca Ryan (winner of America's Got Talent 2006) and is the one I have.


That's all for now, folks...this might be edited later, should I have more songs I want to include. I said "General" at the top because there are so many categories of love songs-Disney, Pop, etc. Come on back now...


~Actresschick <3

The Epic Music Series-Songs of my Childhood.

During my childhood, and even now, my family has let me watch movies like an addict. Cartoons, action, chick flicks, documentaries, romance, drama, musicals, etc. In the past year or so, I've been rediscovering songs from my childhood that are SO worth listening to. There's something about the music or lyrics that is just so wonderful and worthwhile. After listening to them, you may wonder why people waste their time listening to pop music ALL THE TIME and why they don't take these. So take a listen. 


1-The Last Unicorn (The Last Unicorn) http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=5TWkYYkmp9c


Dad rented this movie for us, and this song was quickly one I was singing afterwards. I recently rediscovered it on Youtube. It's interesting.


Music or lyrics-The lyrics are poetic, but I enjoy the music more.


iTunes-Available, though not the version I posted the link to. Sadness. :'(


2-Reach For The Light (Balto) http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=4MgznKabRrA

I've been watching this movie for years. It was, like, my favorite at 6 years old or so. It may also be why I loved the name Jenna for years...


Music or lyrics-Um, BOTH. I love the music, the flutes and drum beats, and the lyrics are like a theme song of life.


iTunes avaliability-Available, but be careful not to get the karaoke or short version by mistake.


3-Once Upon A Time In New York City (Oliver and Company)-http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=2lTffuKP0j0&feature=related

Every time I listen to this, it reminds me of my friend Adam, who loves the city. This is one of those "inspirational" songs, but totally worth listening to. 


Music or Lyrics-Music. Some of the lyrics are amazing, though.


iTunes availability-Available, but not the Huey Lewis version. Still good. :)


4-Wherever You Are (Winnie-the-Pooh's Grand Adventure-The Search For Christopher Robin)-http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=-jgTrEcYt6g&feature=related

This song is so beautiful. I love it to death. Who cares if it's from Winnie-The-Pooh.


Music or Lyrics-Both. You can't separate them, they belong together.


iTunes avaliability-Not available. I was not happy.


5-Love Will Find a Way (The Lion King 2-Simba's Pride)-http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=P6q-lB_jRns

Just the opening flute notes get me in this song. It's purely beautiful. I also loved this movie as a child, maybe a little too much. :)


Music or Lyrics-Probably lyrics. They're beautiful.


iTunes avaliability-Available, but only the pop version by Kenny Lattimore.


6-Beauty and the Beast, End Credits (Beauty and the Beast)-http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=l_Y9PftoAG0


I realized not long ago-well, I am still a child, kinda, it counts-just how much I adore this version. Just the arrangement of instruments is enough to give one chills. And yes, I know it has Celine Dion in it....I love her, I loved this song before I saw Titanic, don't judge ;)


Music or Lyrics-Music, definitely.


iTunes availability-Available.


You bettah be waiting for the next installment of my Epic Music Series. I'm bored a lot. Here is an outlet, talking about something I love. Come on back soon for my love songs, yo...

~Actresschick <3                                                     I love music.

HELP and all our craziness.

So I take drama classes at a homeschool co-op that offers science, Spanish, writing, music, history, and, my personal favorite-musical theatre. Every year, we audition, get roles, and rehearse a musical classic to perform in the spring. I've been Marian in The Music Man Jr. , a soloist in School House Rock LIVE! Jr. , Vlad Vladikoff in Seussical the Musical Jr. , Ida in HONK! Jr. , Hodel in Fiddler on the Roof Jr. , and most recently, I got the role of Grace Farell in Annie Jr. However, I missed the last rehearsal and they made last minute choreography changes, so I couldn't perform in the winter teaser, where we perform one song from the musical, to make a "teaser trailer'' for next year. However, I still had way too much fun hanging with my pals.


We got there WAY too early. We were the only HELP kids in the church building where it was to be held, So Abby was busying herself putting on makeup and I was wandering around. All of a sudden, I asked Abby, "Beez, should I go up onstage while no-one's there and sing my heart out?" 


"Do it."


After a bit of pushing, I got up and belted "Over the Rainbow" to a room full of empty benches and my big sister. Hey, that's fun. I proceeded and was singing "My Heart Will Go On" to my eager little sister. As I reached the end of the song, the Youngs walked in. Britney and Gabriella walked toward the stage, hearing my last notes. As I finished, Britney, enthralled, said, "Let me guess-you're going to be a professional singer, right?" "An actress, actually, in musical theatre," I said, quite pleased at this critique. Britney hurriedly walked to her mom. "MOM! Mom! Did you hear Rachel sing?! I mean, it's amazing!" Ah, this is a good start to the evening. I gave Mrs. Young a hand and plugged in the light-up wreaths and trees. 


The evening got a lot livelier when the Roesner-mobile pulled in and Aaron and Adam hopped out, Adam boasting, "I have a burrito." Singing and talking, they walked in. I smiled. And now the crazy stuff comes.


Admittedly, they are easy to lose. Always on the move, those two. Usually jumping, running, or fighting in slow motion. I saw Aaron walk into the sanctuary, and I went through a different door. "Aaron? Adam? I know you're here." I walked past the benches warily, but not warily enough. "HEY!" Adam shouted, appearing suddenly from behind a wall. Naturally, it scared the living daylights out of me. "YOU GUYS!" I shrieked, punching their arms playfully while they laughed, gleeful at their success. "Hey Rachel!" my friend Olivia said, walking in. Naturally, she was hyper. Way too hyper. But with Liv, it's cool. She pulled out her phone and we jammed to ringtones. 


Soon, more people started arriving. They were excited to see me, and even more excited that I wasn't contagious. I found Bekah, who was standing in for me as Grace, and told her she would do amazingly. She still seemed jittery and shy. She wasn't assured I wouldn't be mad. I was totally cool with everything, though.


Since I didn't have to rehearse, I got to help with other jobs. Mrs. Roesner and I were soon enlisted and found ourselves cutting and making the signs for the reserved benches so no-one would sit there except the cast. I looked at all the Tom Sawyer kids having fun, and I sighed, "I wish I could be up there." Mrs. Roesner looked up and cheerfully said, "Here, more signs!"

I looked at her kinda funny. "Way to make me feel better, Mrs. R."

She found it quite funny. Okay...

Soon, the cast was sitting down and talking excitedly and not getting in anyone's way. We were laughing hard and having a good time. Soon, however, I wandered outside to see the people who were milling about, waiting for the show to start. I quickly found Jake and Cora, whom I hadn't seen for quite a while. I hugged them and we jabbered about things. Soon, though, the show had to start. As I sat there, talking, I didn't notice the tall figure that came up behind me. "HELLO,'' a deep, gravelly voice in my ear. Being how I am, I screamed. Adam, Cory, Aaron, Valerie, and Caleb started to laugh, while I tried to calm my heart and laughed shakily along with them. "JAKE!"

First up were the dance classes, the music classes, and the younger kid's drama class. Adam and I sat next to each other and discussed the different performers. At one point, we had to guess an animal sound, as a following poem would be performed about that animal. Mrs. M, our drama teacher, played the tape and Adam perked up at the chirping noise. "Right! A cricket!" Mrs. M. said cheerfully, and Adam immediately started making a chirping sound that was unmistakably a cricket. Those who could hear started to laugh.

Soon, it was time for the Annie cast to get up and perform. Naturally, it was amazing. I wished I could be in it, but hey, I could be in it next year. For now, enjoy the wonderful job.

We went to the refreshment room, but didn't end up getting any food. Adam, Aaron, Emily, and I drifted off to a quieter place where we could hear ourselves think. There, we discussed Harry Potter and other wonders. We decided I was Neville Longbottom, in the scheme of things. And yes, I picked that.

All too soon, Adam and Aaron had to leave. They went off, and I went to hang with my girlfriends. Soon, Katie, Bekah, Allye, Cora, Cassidy, Natalie, and I were outside. Somehow, Isaac, Justin, and Cory were in the mix as well. We took pictures, laughed, and randomly acted weird. Epic win.

When we left, oddly enough, I wasn't sad. I was bubbling over with memories of the evening.

Now I just have to wait until January 12th for HELP to start up again.

Stage, here I come.

Cass and I outside in the freezing cold :D